Whole Heart, New Start: Love After Divorce (Healing Before Dating)
So… Can I Ever Date Again?
Let’s go ahead and say the thing out loud:
After heartbreak or divorce, at some point, your mind will drift to love again.
But then come the questions:
“Am I ready?”
“What if I attract the same kind of person again?”
“Is it okay to want love after everything I’ve been through?”
Sis… yes. You can love again.
But before you do—let’s make sure you’re loving yourself first. 🙏🏾
Why I Had to Pause Dating (Even When I Felt Ready)
After my marriage ended, there was a season I wanted to prove to myself that I was still desirable.
Still lovable.
Still wanted.
And so I tried to date.
Whewww. Let’s just say… it was not my best chapter. 😅
What I realized was this:
I was trying to fill a wound instead of healing it.
I wanted someone else to tell me I was enough when I hadn’t told that to myself yet.
Signs You May Not Be Ready (Yet)
Here’s what I’ve learned—through personal trial and some cringey missteps 🙃.
You might still be healing if:
You’re constantly comparing every man to your ex
You’re afraid of being alone, so you settle
You ignore red flags because you’re desperate for attention
You can’t clearly answer what you want or need in a partner
This isn’t judgment.
It’s wisdom with love.
💡 So What Do You Do Instead?
You heal first.
You grow into the kind of woman who knows her worth and doesn’t shrink it to be chosen.
Start here:
📜 1. Write a “Non-Negotiables” List
List the values and traits that matter most.
Spiritually grounded. Emotionally available. Respectful. You name it.
Stick to it.
🧘🏾♀️ 2. Date yourself
Go to dinner alone. Take yourself on walks. Learn what brings you joy.
Be someone you love spending time with.
🧎🏾♀️ 3. Pray for your heart—not just for a husband
Ask God to keep growing your emotional strength, wisdom, and patience.
Because the goal isn’t just love. It’s healthy love.
💼 Want Support Preparing for Love Again?
In my Starting Over coaching program, we go deep into rebuilding self-worth, setting emotional boundaries, and getting spiritually ready for new relationships.
We don’t just talk about dating—we talk about becoming the healed woman who attracts the kind of love that honors her soul.
Learn more about Starting Over »
💛 A Gentle Question to Ask Yourself
Tonight, ask:
“Would I want to date me—right now, just as I am?”
If the answer is no, that’s okay.
It’s not shame. It’s a starting point.
And the beautiful thing? You have everything you need to grow into the woman who says yes.
Love will come.
But your healing? That starts with you.
